Bank holidays, a day off. Sweet.
Before I go into full blog mode let’s kick off today’s post with the quote of the day:
“Live like each day is your last. Love like you have never been hurt before. Sing like no-one is listening and dance like no-one is watching”
Can someone tell me why I’ve never used this quote before in my previous posts. I forgot all about this one and I think it sums up life beautifully. I know it encourages me to keep going and hope it has the same impact with you all.
Sometimes we all get in this rut of sheer confusion. Merge confusion with frustration and you get an imploding person which isn’t good for anybody. To be honest I’ve imploded on more than one occasion and the site was ugly, in fact on one instance I had to go for a walk to start thinking straight.
I know with me that I’ve came to the realisation that I cannot keep putting so much emphasis of being something I’m not. What you have to ask yourself is this. If you don’t achieve a goal have you given your best? If the answer is yes then you’ve got nothing to worry about. If it’s no then you cannot be perfect all the time. If you’re my gran then she’ll tell you to get a move on. Good one gran thanks for the vote of confidence, maybe that’s just her generation. Coincidentally it works.
As mentioned before my grandparents grew up during the second world war so their determination is second to none. That’s what makes that generation what it is. Full of drive. That’s exactly what I like.
Today I looked at my condition in the same light. Yesterday whilst talking with my other half over a glass of wine the topic of my condition was raised and the dreaded words “How long have you been seizure free for now” came up. There’s part of my body shudders at the topic of this discussion taking place. I responded by saying “Nearly 4 and a half years” We remember it like it was yesterday.
After that conversation I thought to myself why the hell am I shuddering? I should be bloody proud of myself. Four and a half years? That is immense. In fact maybe my body for the time being is in sync with my mind and the pair are getting along. Referring back to my therapy days that’s one thing Bob taught me. Be at one with your condition because you and the condition may have to live with one another for the rest of your lifetime.
Maybe it’s the fact that for once that I’m trying to live my life the best way I can and my Epilepsy is acknowledging my good behaviour. What I should be taking into account is that if another seizure was to arrive on my doorstep tomorrow I can be the first one to say “Cheers you gave me a good run, now let’s get back to business”. What more can you do? Too many tears have been shed in twenty years. There’s no point in crying anymore. I’ve got so much to live for.
What I’ve noticed is that some people actually believe that once your seizures have gone for a period of time that Epilepsy has left your body entirely. That’s not true. It’s the feeling of waiting for the next one to arrive. It’s the daily medication taking , the shaking and the adapting to the seizures returning anytime. It’s a life changing experience. You have to keep going. You have to understand that life is more than your condition.
My Epilepsy is there for all to see when my body is having those shaky bouts and the excruciating headaches are dominating my daily pattern. Either way I won’t be beaten. I may have to take a couple of hours out however are now in a position to say that I’m not scared of it as much as I once was.
Like all difficult situations you must try to remain strong. Use the quote mentioned at the beginning of the post as your stepping stone. Live each day like it’s your last, keep going and whatever you’re feeling it’ll pass.
To say today has been a good day would be an understatement. My husband and I hit the shops early this morning. Having a cuppa on arrival started the day off nicely. Combine a cuppa with a bowl of cereal was just the fibre I needed to bash the shops.
Happy Fool’s day! My arms DON’T look the dogs bollocks. I can’t crack jokes to save my life however my arms can today.
My streaky arms were well and truly covered. Streaky bacon arms or not I was ready to shop. Getting a decent body scrub was on the top of my agenda along with headache tablets, shampoo and maybe some new eyeliners. The scrub has to get rid of my spotty body complexion.
For all those who have read the blog from the beginning will know I’m quite a girly girl when shopping’s involved, I love my makeup, floral designs and structured pieces. Classic pieces are not only priceless but timeless.
The purchase of the day has to be a pair of Fossil multi purpose glasses that I intend to wear every other day. I wanted a new me. As the weather is changing and the angry Saz is subsiding I thought after tomorrow’s expensive haircut that I want a new me… and that’s what I intend to do. Bank holidays- New attitude. The New Saz. No more hen’s arse hair!!
People literally crack me up when they go shopping. In the UK we have something called “The Next sale”. The majority of my followers probably have been to Next however Next is a shop that sells homewear, men’s. women’s and children’s fashions. Nearly ever house I’ve been in has something from Next whether it be a blouse, a pair of shoes or a home accessory. My mam says my house is a “Next house” as it as a good few accessories from there.. All down to the umpteen Next vouchers I asked for as wedding gifts.
The Next sale is manic. Like all sales the people that go to this store is barmy. People are prepared to queue (I did once) to 4.30am to see what bargains they can find. The Next sale is like a cattle market and looks like a shit tip after 6am. Why we do this god only knows however we cannot help ourselves.
I don’t know if any of you can sympathise but one of my biggest bug bares is Queuing. I personally put this down to Wartime Britain where the public had no choice to wait for their weekly rations. That’s understandable, everyone was in unison. Times have changed since then.
Can people tell me why the hell they can’t queue in an orderly fashion? Why do people just randomly stand there in the middle of the shop thinking that they’re standing in a queue?
It’s only when you go over to the desk that they either push in, grunt or get themselves irate because they believe you are pushing in. What they don’t accept is that they aren’t standing in a designated area where the sign “Please pay here” is noted they just stand anywhere. I’m a lover of helping people however this really gets on my chops.
Right rant over.. The eating went well. We popped into the in laws for the tiniest slither of banana loaf before we drove home for a ham salad sandwich (on brown) and a snooze. A catnap today has been my saviour after an intense headache and a bout of tingly hands. I would be damned if this would stop me from continuing the day therefore got up, completed a mini exercise routine before writing to all you lovely people.
To conclude today’s post. Live each day like it’s your last. Realise that a positive attitude carries you far as does a relaxed you. Don’t lose the drive just cut yourself some slack. As for your medication side effects ride the storm because it’ll be over soon. Remember you can only do what you can do. No one knows you like you do.