Chilled suits me.

Today is a new day and I’m feeling bloody marvellous if I do say so myself.

Last night I decided to speak with my husband and chat about the problems I have been facing over the past few days. If anyone is going to give me a wake up call it’s him. Let’s just say it was enlightening and made me see sense.

Twitter is also a magnificent source of information particularly when talking to my regulars who keep me grounded and motivate me on a daily basis. Cheers guys and dolls!

Twitter has been the way forward for me as I have managed to chat with people across the globe understanding their successes/worries and realising that we are all similar in one way or another. We all share the same interests and all have the motivation to succeed whether that be with our Epilepsy or something else. We all drive one another and seek inspiration from one another.

The quote of the day is:

“The more I think of it, the more I realise that there are no answers, life is to be lived”- Marilyn Monroe.

Say it like you mean it Marilyn you’ve hit the nail on the head there my love! Be more efficient and prioritise. Quite fitting with today’s post.

Life is to be lived and it is to be shared amongst the people you love. It’s best to look at yourself and realise that you have to treat yourself the way you would treat others, with respect and compassion. Sometimes (as hard as it may be) you have to think about you and treat yourself the way you ought to be treat. Run a hot bubble bath, grab a magazine and take time out for you. Just be chilled for once, you’ll be surprised at how relaxed it makes you feel.

Sunday was a write off with me feeling demoralised and upset. The frustration is not something that made me feel powerful; in fact it made me feel powerless. I agree that on occasion you are allowed to get yourself annoyed however it’s the way you handle it is key.

I felt the same way about Epilepsy for years. I felt like the whole world was crumbling down around me. I couldn’t see the wood from the trees. Times were hard however they are getting easier. With me I’m all about helping my medication. The medication drains me at times however as long as I’m healthy and relatively stress free then I’m removing any additional problems.

Last night during my conversation with my husband I looked around me and took in what we had created.

We have turned a house into a home, we have managed to hold down steady jobs, got married and had one hell of a laugh in the process. My husband and I are like two peas in a pod. My husband refers to me as a gobby mackem and I call him a posh Geordie (for all those who aren’t familiar with the words mackem and Geordie they are both words we use to refer to specific accents/dialects/football teams up here in the North east of England) he referred to that in his wedding speech and made me laugh when he said that I was out of his league. Is he joking? He was out of my league.

My husband is without doubt one of the kindest men I know. We aren’t one of these couples who are snogging each other’s faces off and skipping hand in hand into the sunset. We are comical to say the least however serious when we need to be.

We do however think outside the box and seek advice from one another regularly. To think he got away with playing the Jaws music before I walked down the aisle is one of the key aspects of my life that won’t be forgotten in a hurry. The laughter, the mayhem, the fun. We are just us, no false pretence just us.

My husband may open his mouth at the most inappropriate times however that’s what I love about him. I adore his charm, wit and character. I love how he shows me that the world is more than money and accepts me for who I am. Without going to the far ends of a fart my husband understands my Epilepsy and the battle I had to overcome the fear. Men like that are very rare and our conversation yesterday evening indicated to me that I need to clasp that happiness with both hands instead of getting agitated.

Last night I went to bed earlier than normal and decided that I would opt for a little elemis stress balm and pressed it on my temples. I ensured that it had nothing untoward in it and breathed in the eucalyptus more with every breath I took. I felt like I was levitating above my bed like Linda Blair in the Exorcist (however not as frightening) before gently falling onto the bed and drifting into a deep sleep. One word to describe last night’s snooze. Stupendous.

I woke up feeling refreshed and eager to start the day. I had a stonking headache all day however persevered and supped some green tea (after my usual cup of coffee of course). Two words the holistic therapists use to describe green tea refreshing and detoxifying. Me I call it shit in a mug, with a funny aftertaste. Whoever boxed that up and put “detox” on the front was talking a load of cobblers! It’s rotten however I’m trying my best to detox.

I managed to keep on course with my diet (well had a sneaky kitkat but not too bad) before catching up on daily emails and clerical duties. During the course of the day I managed to remain calm and for once I couldn’t be arsed with problems. I just wanted to get what I needed doing done before grabbing my coat and coming home and chilling in front of the fire.

There’s things in life you cannot change and there’s things in life that need to be left well alone. My Epilepsy will always be there along with the other things however it’s a way of controlling them the best way you can. The less I stress the more I can ensure Saz is ok. The more I appreciate life for what it is the less I’ll worry.

To conclude this evening’s post. Hope. Sometimes that’s all you have when you have nothing else. If you have it you have everything.


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